Discontentment, Serpents, Venom and Healing

 Back in mid-April, during my Bible study time, the Spirit impressed upon my heart, that in my reluctance to accept and be content with my new dietary restrictions because of my intestinal dysmotility and gastropareses, I was essentially being like the Israelites in Num 11 & 21. 

Not only does this medical issue cause me a limited diet, or else face painful consequences. It also requires new habits, like walking. A lot. Like 4-5 miles a day to help food move through my system. My walking pad that I purchased in January bit the dust, so it's back to walking outside, in this oppressive heat. Much like the dessert the Israelites wandered, I'm sure. 

I've recently began listening to Billy Graham sermons as I walk and today one of his sermons was on accountability and what transpired in Genesis 3. As I listened, the Spirit again impressed on my heart that Eve's sin was discontentment. She was in paradise. She could eat of any tree but that of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil (Gen 2:16-17) but along came the Deceiver and she became discontent with all that she had because she didn't have it all. There was a limit set on what she could consume. 

I'm also reading a book by Eitan Bar, 'Lost in Translation', and today's chapter just so happened to be on the Hebrew word Nahash. We first encounter this word, usually translated as "serpent" in Gen 3:1. We later also encounter this word in Num 21. Where I was led back in April. 

Both of these encounters with nahash (nachash נָחָשׁ) deal with someone that was discontent with the food God had provided. They wanted more, something different, something they used to have or couldn't have. They had ungrateful, unsatisfied hearts/souls. 

I learn slow. Like I said earlier, this lesson was given to me for the first time back in April, and here it is the end of July and I'm being reminded of it again because I've been making terrible food choices. I feel the best, whenever I eat a very limited variety of "safe foods". And even though I am not in as much pain whenever I stick to this "diet", the discontentment slithers in and I begin to crave everything I can't have. 

Whenever I give in and consume the foods that aren't easily digested or in amounts much too large for my system to move along, I experience the literal truth of Job 20:14 "His food is turned in his stomach; it is the venom of serpents within him."

Father, please cultivate in me a thankful spirit and a grateful heart. Forgive my sin of discontentment. Help me to listen to your voice and look to you. Help me to acknowledge and repent of my sinful longings and believe your promise of goodness. I want to have a humble spirit that accepts whatever you have for me each day with joy and gratefulness. Help me to see all that I have in You more and not to focus on perceived lack. 

"The LORD is my Shepherd, I lack nothing!" Ps 23:1

As I write this Psalm 84:11 and the promise of "no good thing will He withhold" leads me to Luke 11, where Jesus teaches on the prayer.

It's interesting that here in Luke, "The Lord's Prayer" ends at "And lead us not into temptation." 
And in verse 11, He says "What father among you, if his son asks for a fish, will instead of a fish give him a serpent;"

There's a footnote on this verse in my bible that says some manuscripts insert "if his son asks for bread, would give him a stone" 

The words serpent and stone bring to mind temptation/deception and the idea of offense or heavy burden/weight. 

Fish represent abundance, a call to faith and spiritual sustenance. Bread points us to Christ himself as the "bread of life". 

Father, help me to see with eyes of faith that see abundance in what you have given me and trust that you can turn every lack into more than enough. You are not leading me into temptation; you are leading me beside still waters. This is not a hard or offensive heavy load, it is opportunity to trust in your sufficiency.  Help me find rest (contentment) and to trust your "just enough" and lean into a "moment by moment" dependency on You. 

In Jesus' name, Amen.